Monthly Archives: December 2008

Your parents were right

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If you’ve read my blog at all, you know by now that I’m a mother.  As a mother it’s my responsibility to say “no” to everything that might be even remotely fun for my kids to do.  No running with scissors, no playing tag in the street, no dancing in the middle of a WalMart parking lot, no ingesting things that look like they might be candy but are actually medication of some sort (or possibly buttons), no putting your brother in a box and pushing him down the stairs because you saw it in a movie, no screaming Christmas carols at the top of your lungs when you’re inside during rest time, no putting chopsticks in your ears to see how far they go.

See?  I’m no fun!

Well, it pays to listen to your own advice.  Just this weekend I decided to race down the stairs in a big fat rush.  I went sliding down half a flight (thankfully the stairs are both carpeted and broken up into two short flights).  My back is sore, my neck is sore, and my (sadly ample) hind end is sore too!  I am now a walking cautionary tale to my kids, and although I’m in a fair amount of pain, I did see my daughter think twice before jogging with scissors in her hand yesterday…

Letter to Santa

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My daughter wrote her letter to Santa today.  I thought I’d share it with you.  I typed verbatim what she said… although you can’t see the facial expressions that make it particularly cute, it’s still pretty adorable.  

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Dear Santa,

I would like a motorcycle that isn’t too fast that I won’t trip off and it is just my size.  I want princess stuff like a dog, everything.  And I want even a purse that is big enough that I can put everything in there.  A hippopotamus, an alligator and celebration.  And if you don’t mind that I might have a pony that is real that could go outside.  Don’t put him in the house cause he could ride around.  I want him to be outside.  And make him have a rope to tie him on the tree.  And I want dollys that can talk and have a microphone and a wagon.  That’s it.  I’ve been a good girl.  I have cleaned my room.  Mommy helped me and I did all the other stuff.  I did very well today.  And that’s it and I love you too.

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I’m writing a letter to Santa too…

Dear Santa,

I know I haven’t kept in contact, but the last 20 years have been kind of busy.  What have you been up to?  I heard you were starting a new macrobiotic diet, trying to keep the poundage down this year.  Hope that’s working nicely for you.  Don’t worry, I’ll eat plenty of Christmas treats in your stead.  Hey, if you’re not enjoying them, I’m certainly not letting them go to waste!  How’s the Mrs.?  You guys still getting along after all these years?  Let me know your secret.  I know my hubby’s got a place on your “naughty” list this year, but if you could find it in your heart to bring something other than a lump of coal, I sure would appreciate it (especially if you were to bring diamond earrings for him to give to me instead.  Really it’s pretty much the same thing, right?).  Well, I don’t have any real requests for myself this year.  I don’t think even you can add extra hours to my day.  In any case, drive safe.  We’ll be looking forward to hearing from you come the 25th.

Sincerely,

Me


 

Jingle Bells Jingle Bells Ringing In My Head

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Okay, I promised Christmas music, and gosh darn it, I’m gonna deliver!  First, you need to know that I love Love LOVE the Christmas season. When I was little, it was  just my folks, me, and my younger sister.  We’re only 16 months apart, so we shared a room for most of the time growing up.  She was the sister who loved to sleep in Christmas morning.  It would be an understatement to say that I was the opposite.  I would spend most of the night with my face pressed up against the window, straining to see a ray of morning sun.  The rule was, it had to actually be morning before we could get up.  I would shake my sister, whispering fiercely “I think I see some sun, I think we can go into mom and dad’s room!!!!!!”  She would turn over, unimpressed and fall back asleep.  This would usually go on until about 6 in the morning at which time I would be fairly bursting… I’d drag her in to my parent’s room where we (I) would wait impatiently for my dad to check if Santa had come, and to start the coffee (a step I find much value in now that I have two kids of my own!).  When the Christmas music was finally playing softly in the living room, Dad would come in and give us the all-clear.  I am told I would literally shake with excitement upon seeing the Christmas tree, much like one of those little dogs that pee all over you because their little bodies just can’t handle all the excitement.  In later years it was the same thing.  In high school I tried taking sleeping pills the night before to keep me from driving everyone nuts.  I thought for sure they would work, but alas, they didn’t kick in until about 8 o’clock Christmas morning.  I look drugged out or passed out in all the Christmas pictures from that year.  Now that I’m a mother, I’m excited to say, I finally have someone who gets up as early as I do…  my daughter and I are the ones shaking Daddy awake saying “is it time, is it time????”

So in honor of my favorite season, here are some of my favorite Christmas songs!

White Christmas as sung by Bing Crosby (this also happens to be my favorite Christmas movie.  It’s not Christmas without Bing!)

I’ll Be Home For Christmas as sung by Diana Krall (this always makes me cry a little bit when I hear it)

Let There Be Peace On Earth as sung by Vince Gill (this was my grandpa’s favorite song, and every time I hear it I think of him)

Christmastime Is Here as sung by the Peanuts (I also love playing this one on piano)

Christmas Dreaming as sung by Harry Connick Jr. (just try and stop yourself from swaying rhythmically while listening to this!)

Song For A Winter’s Night as sung by Sarah McLachlan (it’s so haunting and beautiful.  Close your eyes and you’re in a big squishy armchair next to a roaring fire watching the snow fall outside.)

In The Bleak Midwinter as sung by James Taylor (in my family you just can’t have Christmas without some James…)

Christmas Songs That Make Me Bleed From The Ears (aka Christmas Songs I Never Want To Hear Again As Long As I Live or Sorry If You Like These, But They Make Me Want To Stab A Fork In My Hand To Distract From The Pain I Feel While Listening To Them) I’ve included the link just in case you want to subject yourself to the torture.

Jingle Bells as sung by Barbara Streisand (sorry Babs… and I have to hear this every year cause my mother LOVES it)

Simply Having A Wonderful Christmas Time as sung by Paul McCartney

All barking dogs/yowling cats edited to sound like a Christmas song

Now, if you don’t listen to a single Christmas song listed here, I’m asking sweetly for you to listen and enjoy my daughter’s favorite Christmas song… It’s one of my favorites, and I promise if nothing else, it will bring a smile to your face

Short Stack’s Favorite Christmas Song

What are some of your favorite songs at Christmas time?  Any that make you want to scream?  Let me know… I always love hearing from you 🙂

Let’s talk about pregnancy

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First of all, for my friends and family that read my blog… I am not pregnant again.  Let me repeat, I am NOT pregnant again!  Now, that doesn’t mean I haven’t checked… in fact, I’ve been checking a lot lately.

I have no reason to suspect that I am pregnant.  No symptoms, no “forgetful moments”.  Nothing.  I am just slightly obsessed with the fact that I might be pregnant.  It’s not like I want to be pregnant either.  I have my hands full with my two kids as it is (and my husband, who let’s face it, is just a large child himself).  I don’t dream of snuggly clothes in pink or blue, I don’t drool over the thought of an expanding waistline.

It started a few months ago when I really did get freaked I might be preggers again.  My sister was overjoyed as was my mom… they love having kids to spoil (did I mention they live across the country and are therefor unable to assist with the late nights and poopy diapers that inevitable accompany a new family member?).  Me, I wasn’t so happy.  My youngest is still a Huggies man, and my four year old currently thinks she’s 16 which leaves me tired out at the end of the day.  Well, I took a test and no line appeared (HUGE SIGH OF RELIEF)… but then I thought, “what if I tested too early?”  so a week later I bought another test with the same single pink line smiling happily at me.

Now it’s become an obsession.  I’ve taken a test almost every week since then, twisting and turning that little window to get just the right light… trying to decipher if there’s the faintest line mocking me just under the surface.

I know what you’re thinking… you’re thinking maybe subconsciously I do want to get pregnant.

BUT YOU’D BE WRONG!  STOP THINKING THAT THIS SECOND!!!!!

Maybe I just like peeing on little sticks…

Stay tuned for my list of favorite Christmas carols and why they rock my mistletoe!